“What will this cost me?” I was facilitating a session with a team and this gem of a question dropped from one of the wise leaders on the team. She was explaining how taxing it can be when people react with high emotion to situations at work. Even when the message is spot on, you can lose people along the…
In the midst of strategic planning and all the things leadership teams discuss and debate, conflict is inevitable. I noted a great quote from one of my leadership teams today, “we debate to learn, we don’t debate to win.” This is a simple phrase which keeps the outcome clear, lets us debate ideas, opportunities, the search for the right answer…
Goals. They’ve seemed challenging to envision this year, haven’t they? When uncertainty prevails, we default to paralysis. We wait, hoping for certainty, familiarity, and what we “knew” to be true. Funny thing is, it wasn’t true, it was predictable. Truth be told, predictability will fail you. When any of us gets too comfortable, we settle. Settling leads to mediocrity. What…
Friends for a lifetime. It’s been said before, but those people who you’ve known since childhood – perhaps single digits, you can go months and years without seeing them and when you reunite it’s as if you’ve never missed a day. It’s remarkable really. I had one of these days with my best friend and her husband recently. We met…
Listening and learning. The two skills partner nicely. It’s refreshing to dial in, listen and be fully present without trying to influence, persuade, discuss or debate. In order to affect change, listening is key. Without deep listening, there can be no understanding. Without understanding, we will fail. Who do you need to listen to today?
Have you ever wished there was less tension during a work meeting? Me too; and after review, I won’t wish it away. Tension is related to conflict and conflict creates clarity. While it may be uncomfortable, that tension is what transforms a problem into an opportunity. It’s also is transformative for learning. We must diverge to truly be able to…
That conversation you’re having, it’s a distraction. What conversation? The one you’re having almost constantly with yourself. (And the one you heard when asked “what conversation?” above.) Sometimes it’s so loud you’re not present for the people, conversations or life events as they’re happening. Beyond that, you’re getting limited input, you’re focused inward and you’re missing opportunities. If you’re wondering…
Have you ever had a really challenging person in your life? Of course you have. We all have. The great news about being in their presence, especially if it’s with frequency, is that they are showing us exactly what NOT to do on a daily basis. Some may get exasperated, however from a space of gratitude, they are the perfect…
Excellence requires discipline. When you don’t have discipline, you get sloppy. When you get sloppy, you fit right in with the mediocrity the status quo fully supports. To do anything at a level of mastery, it requires focus and discipline. If the people around you aren’t on the same page, they will work to talk you into being reasonable. Being…
A goal is not enough. It’s important, but it won’t motivate you on a day when things are tough. How do you find your mojo if you really want to attain something and your mood just isn’t supporting you? You can use external means: You can shift your internal dialog: Motivation is a tricky thing, it’s all internal and you’re…